It all started with a class action law suit. I love them. Do nothing, receive a check in the mail. Some people are scared away by those kind of letters. My mom for instance, has never noticed one come in the mail let alone fill out the form and send it back in. My sister didn't know that when you live in an SRP area and pay for APS (who knows why this happens?) You qualify for a return on your money. Once again, all you have to do is fill out the form.
And my family thinks I just get lucky with money. HA! I work for it.
American Family insurance was being sued for not paying sales tax on their client's claims. Seems dumb enough but why not sign up? I must qualify because I am receiving the letter. Months later, I received a check via regular postal mail. $6.34 cents. Well at least it was easily earned! A couple weeks later I got one of those orange cards on my doorstep saying I had certified mail. The sender.. American Family. Well, I already received my check... if there was more they would have just sent it. I just knew it was probably something dumb! I assumed the post office would redeliver. I swear I have received these before and they did... but 5 days later.. another orange card. I am free to pick up my letter(s) now two of them.. after the following date.. 3-05-08. Okay, so I kinda forgot about it with Austin's birthday and all. However, cleaning up the day after his party (3-15-08) I find the card. I read it again. It states, Final notice or letters will be returned to sender on 3-15. Oh man. I figure I better go get it. I suppose it could be more money, right? I am on my way to get my letters, and the baby is pissed because she has an ear infection, is getting 3 new teeth at the same time, and I just tricked her into her car seat. I have to stop and get gas. I pull up at Costco. Every pump (as usual) is full for left sided pumpers. I pull up on the right. Stretch the tube out and get gas while Avery howls. My stomach is growling. What do I want to eat? I need to buy the kids' Easter basket chachca. Target or Walmart? Back in the car. Think about Taco Bell. No, Avery is too fussy.. straight to post office. Out of car, walk in, wait in line. Finally up there.. this better be good, I think. Nice post man. I explain that I misplaced my orange card, the letters may be gone, but just in case. He says okay he will look. He turns the card over. OH! I am at the wrong postal location, he tells me. dag nammit. I don't want to drive to the other side. If I go all the way over there, I might as well pick Ileigh up, and it's too early for that. Target and Walmart are on this side of town.. AND if I wait till later to go pick up my special letters, they may be gone since this is all taking place the day after the orange card said they would send my letters back. arghhh.. Ok. I will just go get some food, stay calm, and drive to the post office. Maybe Avery will fall asleep in the car? I wrestle her back into her car seat and peel out of the parking lot. I pull into Arby's. Everything is overpriced and my coupons are all at home. I choose just a simple sandwich. no fries. no drink. $4!!!! I decide to ask for the special sauce that doesn't come in packets since I am paying out the wazooo for a single sandwich. They give it to me in a little container. I pull into the Fed Ex parking lot to eat while the baby complains. Pull out of there. Down the road, turn left at 28th street. Down the road, it doesn't go all the way through, back track to 32nd street, and turn the corner. There goes the horsey sauce all across my console and down beside my seat. I look while driving and see a huge drip about to touch the carpet. I do not do well eating and driving, let alone cleaning while driving. Some people can, I can't. I grab a napkin and try to stop the mess. I get all sticky but find a wet wipe while passing the parking lot for the post office. Could that be it? An empty parking lot? And I have never noticed a post office here before. I didn't even know about it. Did I mention it's in a really SHADY part of town. And I don't mean lots of trees.
I manage my way to the parking lot, finish cleaning up, grab Avery and proceed the risk of our lives. First I have to walk along a major road with speeding cars and I envision myself being creamed as a driver veers up on the sidewalk. So trusting, you have to be in this life. I make it to the door. I walk in to see rows and rows of post office boxes. No line. No numbers. No attendants. No wonder the parking lot was empty. I find what looks like a metal plate on the wall with several notices on it. Was I in the right place? I feel like I am in a horror movie. It was that creepy. I catch a few scary stares as some creepy men come and go in the empty room. I hate post offices! Even more than banks. ughh. I start to read the notices.. "In an emergency please call 911." duh. "This is not an operating post office!" (would Mr. nice post man have steered me wrong?) no, I don't think so. "We do not sell stamps here."" You cannot mail packages here."" This is a working dock. Please ring buzzer and wait for an attendant. There may be someone working on the dock. Please wait patiently." What the hell? Even creepier. I ring the buzzer and hear it echo far away. I shudder and think of leaving. I look around. I could be killed here and no one would see. I hate this office. I hate this neighborhood. Are these stupid letters worth it? Would they even have them? They better. Finally a man comes. He asks for ID. He gives me my letters even though my ID has a different last name on it. I race back to my car and jump in. Andy calls and I tell him the story. I decide the baby is too dang fussy to go to Target or Walmart. I go home and open my exciting letters. "This is to inform you that your claim to American Family insurance has been denied." Okay, let me get this straight. I received a check from American Family already in the regular mail. I ordered an 800 dollar camcorder that was thrown on my porch that I didn't even need to sign for. The Christmas fiasco bouncer was thrown on my front porch with a huge pictured depicting what was in the box last December. Yet a letter informing me that I will not be receiving any more money, I risked my life for.
NICE.
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